Sunday, June 30, 2013

Converting to Judaism, Chapter 2 - First steps:

 After our flight from Vegas, Stephan and I stayed at an extended stay hotel for about a month while we looked at apartments to rent for a year. Living in the hotel was kind of fun. I don't know what it is about staying in a hotel that always has sort of a fun feel to it, but we enjoyed our time there. It's probably because whenever we've stayed in hotels in the past it was associated with vacation and being in a new neat place that serves free fresh baked cookies at night with coffee. A true adventure isn't really an adventure without bumping into some rocks along the way. We experienced our first power outage living in the hotel with our 3 month old. It was summer time and being in a hotel with a 3 month old with no AC was not a pleasant experience. Thankfully, our little one handled everything very well. I would bring him downstairs sometimes to the lobby to cool off and would always get comments on how calm he was. Thankfully we were able to check into the hotel next door which had power and the hotel we originally stayed at gave us our money back for the days that the power was out.

     Once we survived the power outage and another rock we bumped into was figuring out where to live. In the short term, we ended up picking an apartment in Rockville, MD and started the process of getting our things together and seeing how to start the process of converting to Judaism. My husband started his new job at GEICO and that's where he met his first observant Jew. He asked him if he had any problems with the company being Jewish and all and he told him they should set up a time to meet to talk more. Anyway, they hit it off and Yaacov called a friend of his who recommended 2 rabbi's who do conversions - one in Rockville, and one in DC.

     We wanted to make sure we went with a credible Bes Din because we wanted to do things right. We have heard sad stories of people who wanted to convert and went with people who were not credible and had to find out the hard way. For instance if  you want to move to Israel to become a citizen as a Jew, they need to know you converted with a credible Bed Din otherwise your conversion will be considered invalid. So we, not knowing this when we moved, ended up going to the one Bes Din who's head Rabbi actually worked with the Chief Rabbi of Israel on coming up with a standard for converts in the U.S, to be accepted in Israel. So we were so happy to find that out and knew we were in good hands.

   The Rabbi in Rockville held weekly classes about the Torah portion of the week, Jewish history, and other things that we needed to know.  Just as important was the Shalosh Seudos every Shabbos, giving us our first taste of kiddush, challah, Shabbos songs, and davening (praying).  We met lots of Jews, many who were on a similar path as us, not being raised as observant Jews.  We also met another Rabbi who substituted for the Rockville Rabbi when his voice went out, who we liked.

     It was to expensive to buy a house in Rockville though, so we looked for where the best place for us to live would be after factoring in things like, affordability, Jewish schools for our kids, distance from work, how many shuls(aka synagogues) were in the area.  Stephan's little spreadsheet indicated that Silver Spring was the place to be.  It had a good sized Jewish community with 4 different shuls we could go to if we wanted, the most affordable housing, and was next to a few kosher restaurants and grocery stores.

   We eventually got around to calling up the Rabbi who is head of the Bes Din and set up an interview for our conversion. On the day we went down there, there was traffic (we weren't aware of how bad D.C. traffic can be at the time) so we were late for our first meeting which we were not happy about.  Luckily, the Rabbi was still there. We apologized and the first question he asked us was "Why do you want to do this crazy thing?" We laughed and told him our story. When we told him about the article that we found online about "A Primer: Why Jews Can't Believe in Jesus" the Rabbi asked who wrote it and we told him it was Baruch Gershom and he said he knew the author, who was using that as a pseudonym, and he lives in Silver Spring. We were stunned and thrilled that the community we had already picked is the same community that the guy who wrote the article which started this whole thing.

   Anyway the only problem was we were having trouble finding a sponsoring Rabbi. A sponsoring Rabbi is required in order for you to convert. He is the one you study with and basically teaches you how to be a Jew and vouches for you to the Bes Din that you are in fact doing everything you are being taught. I was actually told by a Rabbi that there is no way we would find a sponsoring Rabbi in Silver Spring or really anywhere because it requires so much work and it's not really an obligation on any Rabbi to do so, so why would they do it?  The only other option to convert was to for Stephan to take a year off work and study with the Rockville Rabbi. That was definitely not possible for us since were not Rockefellers and couldn't afford to take that long off of work. 

     Feeling defeated and restless with how hard it was to just be able to find a sponsoring Rabbi, I called one of the Rabbi's on the Bes Din and vented to him about how frustrating it was. That Rabbi was really understanding and told me he would help me find a Rabbi in Silver Spring. Being the pessimist that I am, not  really thinking it would happen, I still didn't feel any better about it. However he ended up calling me back and gave me a number to a Rabbi that said he wold be willing to help us. The rabbi invited us over to meet and talk and as we were driving there, I said, "Wouldn't it be neat if it was that nice substitute Rabbi we met in Rockville?", and Stephan laughed and agreed. The door opened and sure enough, it was. I think they were surprised to see it was us too. Finally we could move forward in our conversion and live in the place we felt we were meant to live in. 

     Now it was time to start house hunting! YAY! We found a nice Jewish agent who helped us out a lot with the house hunting process and ended up with a really great deal on a great house with only a 5 minute walk to the Shul we wanted to go to. We packed up all of our things for the 3rd time in 2 years and moved on over to our new house. We met some people from around the neighborhood and most of them seemed to go to the same minyan(Prayer service).  Stephan decided to try out that minyan. His first time there, he was looking around to see where he should sit and the Gabbi(usher/coordinator) noticed that he looked lost and suggested that he sit by his father-in-law who could help him out. The father-in-law came over and reached out  to shake his hand and introduced himself, and guess who it was... It was Baruch Gershom! Stephan shook his hand in disbelief. Now every Shabbos, Stephan davens right next to the guy who wrote the article that got everything started for us. I think it's safe to say we're in the right place now.



3 comments:

  1. Did Rabbi F ever read my Primer?

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  2. My article: A Primer: Why Jews Can't Believe in Jesus is no longer at the URL you provided (About.com got a new editor of its Judaism page who decided to write something of her own in my place -- "then came a new pharaoh who knew not Joseph"). Those who want to read my article should go to http://www.angelfire.com/md3/baruchgershom/ynotj.html One day I will get around to putting it on a better site and improve a few things.

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